This post is likely gonna get a little personal and it’s probably gonna piss some people off and if it does what I hope, it will change the way you look at people (hopefully not me – at least not in a negative way!)
So, do me a favor and think back to the people you know in your life and in your family….have any of them done something wrong, broken the law, gotten in trouble (before they actually grew up?!) I didn’t put an age because some people grow up before others and some are 30 and 40 and have not yet grown up. Think of how you thought of them or treated them ….
Now think, have you personally ever made any mistake, learned a difficult lesson, done something that others haven’t approved of, broken the law (oh yeah if you’ve got a lead foot you’ve broken the law – haven’t you?)??
I could probably stop now and you will look at people in a more positive light. But I’m not going to. I want this post to hit home. The one thing I’ve always done with every person I know is look at the positive. I have never judged and I most certainly have NEVER talked about someone that I wouldn’t say to their face. And chances are I have told them to their face.
Now where my post gets personal. My husband and I have both had some issues, made some life changing decisions (that were not totally positive) and faced some rough roads in our life. This is where you actually relate to me — because if you haven’t had challenges you haven’t lived! We do not typically share the roads we’ve travelled with people because it is irrelevant of who we are today. Your past does not determine your future.
On the occasion I will share this information with people who I feel are closest to me. Never in a million years did I think it would change our relationship, but it did. Not only did it change the relationship I had with these few people we told, but it changed our relationship with people who we didn’t even tell….I’m sure I won’t have to tell you why…we’ll chalk it up to drama-feeders, jealousy, and pure immaturity. Like I said can’t put an age on growing up.
When someone confides in you – asks you not to share your stories, do you share them with others? Voice your opinion to others about people? Do you think of who you are hurting in the process? Do you judge them?
If you feel the need to talk about somebody elses’ life and situation, do me a favor, make sure you have room to talk. Make sure you’re not out their fucking up your own life, sneaking around, being immature, and most of all make sure that you’ve got all the facts before you open your mouth.
If you don’t care who you hurt, go ahead, bring the drama in your life. As I say KHARMA is a bitch … she is not your friend. You may not get yours today, tomorrow or even this year, but you’ll get yours and the person on the other end will be sitting there knowing it’s what they deserve.
And if you think to judge someone on their past, remember there is only one jury and judge. Your judgement day will come and you will be judge on how you treated people that you come in contact with.
One thing I’ve always done is look for the best and positive in people. I expect that people will have secrets, that people will have issues, that people will have made mistakes in their life. But that doesn’t change the way I look at them.Maybe I’m too nice. I’m the one who gets talked about behind my back, and people are nice to my face…well screw that … I’d rather someone say nothing to me, lose a few “wanna-be-friends” than be talked about behind my back, and a smile to my face. I have all I’ve ever needed, are a few less friends really gonna change my life? What about you, are there a few people in your life that you’d be okay if they weren’t friends (or even family)?
If people thought I was a bitch before…wait for my biography — I won’t use fake names to protect the guilty. And it will be a Number 1 Best Seller. My life and happiness will not be determined by someone’s need to have something to talk about at a local party. I love my life, I love the people in it (those that matter anyways), and I love what I do. I may get pissed off at people’s actions but I don’t dwell.I have a life to live.
I do not expect people to be perfect. Perfection does not exist. I am not perfect. But I do look for positive, good-hearted people, if you feel the need to talk about me, do me a favor and don’t get involved with me, my husband or my kids. I don’t need people (the negative, drama-induced men & women) who have not yet grown up.